Monday July 25th 2011

Hello, to any reader out there, well things with my Aunt to pretty much the same, she is still at her house, she still needs oxigen all the time..well i believe God has given her another chance to ask him for forgiveness and to accept him in her life, i sure do hope that one day she willaccept him into her life..

Things with me are pretty much the same,except for the fact that i have been drinking a lot, more then usual. Don't really know why i do it, i just like the way it makes me feel, i forget about all the frustration and anger and saddness i have in my life..i know its wrong for me to be drinking like that, but once i start i really can't stop myself from drinking..i just hope one day i don't end up doing something stupid..

My brother went to drink on Saturday with my ex-boyfriend and another co-woker..he ended up at home at around 4:00am..the next day he didn't want to know anything about drinking :) I did hate the fact that he went with Jaime (my ex) but they are friends i can't really tell him not to hang out with him..another thing that i hated was that Jaime texted me saying not to worry about my brother that they are at their house drinking..come on please, i don't really worry about him..i didin't answer him..then around 12am he called my phine and just hung up, then about 1am he called again to my phone and just hung up..so i just turned my phone off so he wouldn't be bothering me anymore..I loved him, but he was just playing around with me and my feelings, so i told him not to call me or text me, much less talk to me if it wasn't necessary...so i have been ignoring him completely..it hurts me to do this but, i can't be with someone who doesn't take me serioulsy..i rather just stay alone then be with someone who doesn't love me..i have always told myself, God is the first man in my life, he is the only one that I need..if God wants to give a good husband some day, then i will accept him..

Things here in our city haven't gotten any worst, no gun shots have been heard in a while, hopefully things stay the way they are right now..this city is calm right now..Sometimes i am still afraid of going out at nights, but we can't always be living with fear all our lifes..thats something i really need to tae in myself :)

well i gotta get back to work..well its not like i am working very hard :)See you all later, God bless you all

Time is 4:44pm